Years ago, when I started writing poems, they became my way of interpreting bottled-up emotions.
I would bleed the pen into notebooks. Rip parts of myself into tiny pieces and explore what my tongue was afraid to say.
Eventually, words transformed into a healing spring and thus the power of poetry to transform was born.
My therapists were the journals, my secret keepers.
My unjudgmental best friend, that never weaponised what I felt and wrote.
In retrospect, poems allowed me to revisit past moments. Compare and contrast lives lived to the present. The words on my selected canvas, made me see the transformation from Then Til Now. *
Developing the Early Years
Question for you, the reader: Were you ever called “Too much” growing up?
Perhaps you were the kid in class who chat everyone's ear off. Your tongue was the gateway to an overactive imagination, but your peers just labelled it the “chatterbox.”
Did teachers validate this label and send you out of the classroom for being disruptive?
And during Parent-Teacher Day, they made sure to include a new label, “too talkative,” in the performance report.
Yet another “too..” label was added to the growing external identities decided for you.
And at home, the labelling didn't stop.
When tears sprung after a “joke” made at your expense, you were now “too sensitive.”
The Years of Silence
Well, this was me and if this resonates with your experience too, you no doubt know what happened next.
For those who’ve been labelled “Too Much,” we often forged an armour to protect future attachments of labels. The outer layer was fortified with aggression and coldness. A vow made that words nor actions would never be weapons used against you ever again.
And before they made you feel odd or less than, you would take control and inflict the pain and hurt before they did.
Unfortunately, you may have even inflicted this hurt physically on yourself by self-injury, cuts and bruises you told yourself were needed to test the armour.
Instead of being who I truly was and feeling what I genuinely felt, I became dishonest about my thoughts. Like in the years of pharaohs, I cut out my metaphorical tongue and became mute—my personal act of survival.
Many who have been silenced followed the same pattern. The older I got, I learned I wasn’t alone in masking inner turmoil of imposter syndrome behind a facade of confidence.
The Years of Acceptance
Years rolled into decades, and I started to travel. I met people from all walks of life with different personalities and perspectives.
This started the real mental shift from silencing to understanding.
It was no longer about the external circumstances that molded the overthinking thoughts. My unending self-critical nature to prevent that “too much” labelling to be repeated.
On one instance, I met a South African. Her name was Nelle. She was bold in her demeanor, honest with her candor and bright with her voice. She did not conform to what people told her to be and whether or not you liked her, that was your problem, her purpose was to be heard and seen.
These different worlds of people were all being themselves, in spite of being labelled by society as too much. They used their inner voices and did not shy away.
Her method was flashy fashion, bold speeches and being the center of attention. I accepted that I wasn’t her. I had to use what I already had within me to experience the same freeing outcome. To drop the mask and reclaim my voice with my bestie, poetry.
I went back to the familiar pages of self-reflection and self-discovery. I turned every pain into power while healing wounds I pretended were my strengths.
I had lost so much time, friends, family and opportunities because I was silencing my true voice.
Acceptance came from the decision to shape stories, emotions and observations on the page. Like looking in a mirror, I started to see myself again.
Poetry Therapy: Emotional Acceptance and Resilience
So, how does this tie into Poetry Therapy, and what is it really?
To be completely honest, the phenomenon was new to me.
I thought I was working through things by writing and performing poetry. I never knew this wording method was a concept of Therapy.
According to the National Association for Poetry Therapy, it is:
Imagine my surprise when I researched what I was already doing at the age of 12 years old.
I had composed lyrics, rhymed stanzas and expressed emotions with creative wordplay.
The window to my soul was inadvertently healing my self-doubt, childhood trauma and in the later years, adult chaos.
In short, I was in the personal growth and development process.
Who Does Poetry Therapy Benefit?
It's really a simple answer: Everyone and Anyone!
See, poetry doesn't discriminate.
It has no preferences or heavy demands.
I liken it to the proverbial saying of God inviting people to come as they are to his temple. Poetry invites you just the same.
I know, they say the Artform is antiquated.
Who wants to read Shakespeare and sonnets? The roses are red, and everyone know it already, right?
Consider the bestselling book of all time: the Bible.
It was written centuries before our modern concept of ‘therapy.’ Through my years researching self-help and personal development, I noticed how many of today’s greatest speakers echo biblical wisdom.
Whether you are a believer or not, these timeless teachings were used as guiding principles for humanity:
Bible: “…weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.” (Psalms 30:5)
Maya Angelou: "Every storm runs out of rain."
Bible: “And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.” (Luke 6:31, a Golden Rule).
Dalai Lama: “Our prime purpose in this life is to help others. And if you can’t help them, at least don’t hurt them.”
And what literary format fills much of the Bible? Poetry—the OG therapy.
The use of metaphors, similes, and rhythmic flow were used as illustrations to profoundly impact the listener.
Poems will forever stand the test of time to heal, express love and connect you to what truly matters.
Your inner peace and outer purpose.
Poetic Transformation
This transformation in personal development isn't a sunset and sunrise occurrence.
It took me ten years before I published my first book of poetry and even longer to realise I needed to change in order to secure a fulfilling future. Publishing the words that kept me sane, reawakened the silent river and created a waterfall of transformation.
Although, the terminology is new in title. It's older than all our ages combined making it a true source of wisdom and knowledge for growth.
Like the white lines in the road or an umbrella amid a downpour, poetry guides and protect mental and emotional health as an awareness tool.
I know this because when I was lost it was a universal day star. The low confidence, negative talk, the way I treated others and how I saw the world was reshaped from hurt to heal. From silenced to heard. From pain to purpose.
Final Thoughts: A Poetic Invitation
Now, I do not wear titles for the sake of performing to society’s expectations anymore.
I am not a coach. I am not a therapist. I am not a mentor.
What I am is a poet. I am a problem-solver, a truth seeker and an emotion whisperer.
I use flaws and struggles to highlight the successes and pivots I had to make.
Now, I help others shorten their time span to emotional and mental recovery. That way, it doesn't take more than twenty years it took me to stop allowing that “too much” label to hinder progressive purpose.
And similar to when I travel and have new experiences like in Colombia, I tried ‘big-ass ants’ (don’t mind the name, that's what the delicacy was called). I recommend trying Poetry Therapy at least once before deciding it isn't for you.
You can test the waters right now by writing your thoughts with a poem in the comments about what feeling this piece stirred.
It doesn't have to rhyme; make it messy, make it real, and let it be raw.
And if shyness is your companion, you can send it to me in a direct message.
I want to read them all.
Your Story should be told; your wounds can be healed and your unique life matters.
If you are ready to give Poetry Therapy a try and want a personal problem solver in your pocket, let's talk.
And if you want more time to figure things out. I created an interactive tool with Then Til Now The Decade Continues Volume II poetry collection. *
The poetic workbook confronts harsh truths, promotes deeper reflections and gives you daily support with mantras, life lessons, and additional features for acceptance, growth and freedom.
If I were to list all the benefits, this final thought would become a new personal essay.
I hope to be a part of your upcoming transformation.
Until next time. Keep working towards your dreams (whatever they are, it's all possible if you choose it.)
Love,
Toya (Your Travelling Poet)
